Hockey Cop Archives: Disney's Polynesian Resort

Okay, so it's been just a little while since I've posted anything. I've been busy. Hey, I gave fair warning in the delay of service.

But Jesse just had to pressure me into doing an entry during our conversation last night. I love and hate Jesse for the exact same reason: he tells it like it is and doesn't sugar-coat his feelings and personal desires. Actually, I love it a whole lot more than hate it because there's no guess-work with him.

With that being said, here is part of the conversation last night.

----

Jesse: "So what's going on with the blog? You haven't put anything up in a while."

Me: "Well, I've been real busy with school stuff, my regular job and the fact my family is coming in this weekend."

Jesse: "I don't care. I want to see more pictures."

Me: "But Jesse, I really should be concentrating more on school and things and so..."

Jesse: "No, it should be about me and my desires! My wants!"

Me: "I'll see if I can get something up in the next week..."

Jesse: "Tomorrow. It has to be tomorrow! Do you understand me!?!"

Me: "Please don't yell Jesse. I'll try to..."

Jesse: "Trying is failing! Do it!"

Me: (sniffing sounds)

Jesse: "Don't tell me you're crying. Don't you dare tell me you're crying."

Me: (fighting back tears) "N-n-n-no. Of course I'm not...(sniff)...crying."

Jesse: "What did you say to me?!?"

Me: (sobbing) "No! I'm not crying!"

Jesse: "What did you say? Say it again right!"

Me: (crying more and more) "No, I'm not crying!"

Jesse: "No, I'm not crying what?!"

Me: (crying hysterically) "No I'm not crying, sir!"

Jesse: "Louder!"

Me: (having totally lost it) "NO! I'm not crying, s-s-s-sir!"

Jesse: "Louder! And mean it!"

Me: (on the floor balling) "NO! I'M NOT CRYING SIR!"

Jesse: "Say my name!"

Me: (scared of the wrath, blinded by tears) "JESSE! You're name is Jesse!"

Jesse: "And what does Jesse want?!?"

Me: (face red with shame and fear, eyes bloodshot from wailing in terror) "Pictures on the blog! The blog!"

Jesse: "Pictures of the Polynesian!"

Me: (without hesitation) "The Polynesian sir!"

Jesse: "Don't you dare disappoint me again! You hear me!?!"

Me: (crying, crying...)

[dial tone]

---Note: Some of the events of the previous conversation have been artistically modified for effect.---

----

Of course I'm only kidding around.

Sorta...

Love you Jesse! But he did ask for some pictures of the Polynesian. Nicely, I might add. So I'm going to give them to you guys. Darrell should really enjoy these too because the Poly is basically The Tiki-Motel. On to the pictures!

You may remember this the hotel where I got lei.

It is an absolutely beautiful resort. The main lobby is teaming with plants, water, and art. There was even an artist there working on a painting. I don't think he was anyone's nephew by the way. The stores were (in very Disney fashion) detailed to the T. One was arranged as a kind of beach-bum paradise escape type thing.

Outside was the hotel itself. It was a collection of buildings named after islands and island chains, such as Hawai'i, Fiji, and so forth. The pool was a zero-entry pool and was volcano themed. The entire resort rests on the beaches of the Seven Seas Lagoon.

There is a wonderful show there as well in addition to character dining with Lilo and Stitch. The Neverland Club is also here. This is where parents can drop off their children for a supervised dinner adventure. Basically, they load them up on soda and pizza and let them run around like animals while Disney movies play in the background.

But the main thing about this resort was the tikis. There are freakin' everywhere man. I mean everywhere. On the buildings. In the plants. Inside the resorts. Even the showers in the pool areas were tikis The other store in the lobby was the BouTIKI. I love the tiki staring in the window from the outside trying to find the other tiki.

There's a few great places to eat at the Polynesian, including the quick-service Capt. Cook's and the magnificent O'hana. O'hana food is cooked over a large flame and the theme of the restaurant is, you guessed it, tiki. Take a look at the picture with the tables. How would like to eat your meal next to Chief Wannahawkaloogie?